HARD TO BELIEVE THE TRUTH!

PART I - Motivation

When we always do something, we want success no matter whatever may it be. We experience a lot of trouble before achieving it. Especially for some, the world would have been perfect if it had been quite alone with them. They often tend to feel uncomfortable with a lot of people around them, and often tend to misjudge their failure with the crowdedness around them. And not taking the bitter aspect that they do not have enough potential within them. Taking you around an example of my story, from my childhood days it always had been a hard time getting through with friends of my age. I always find it hard to make friends, who I can truly rely upon. Maybe because of my physique, my friends feel I am kind of old and not fit with them. Wherever I studied there was always a gang that kept mocking me down and all the members of my age where in that gang except one, and that one was I. I could even remember still now, how I cried to my mom of not having any friends when I was studying second standard. She used to convince me by saying you got that one precious friend who never lets you down and that no one of your friends had any, and that precious friend was my mom.

She could somehow convince me at my small age, but when I grew bigger life became worse. When I was at the junior school, I always wanted to become a topper so that I can show everyone that I am not lower to them in any way. It became difficult to sit in a class, where all the toppers used to mock me in one way or the other. And each time I try to get good marks with all the hard work and only end up as an average student. Even when some of the parents of the toppers of my class came to meet the class teacher, only to complaint about me that I am the one responsible for turning their kinds down by mocking them. You could hardly see how I felt that moment. It is as if that god himself had no mercy on me. I would have gone out of control, if it hadn’t been for our teacher who clearly said that he is in no way related to your kids’ low performance, it is your son who had to improve. It is at that time I believed in that teacher more than god himself. Every time I saw that teacher, it is as if I saw god, I saw my hope through her. Time passed by it was time for my senior school.

The first time when we feel as a grown up kid, we get to wear pants, we come in motor cycles; we have our own cell phone, and lot more. It is at that time when we feel we became the rulers of the school who set their own rules, well not me as it is once again that I am a lonely looser. Things become worse as I set foot in my senior school. I went from average to poor category. I could hardly pass an exam. It is at this time I explored a lot of things around me, how my once said toppers topped the class then, it is because they had early tuition during the holidays, before we even entered in to our portions. I was desperate to get tuition too, but my father refused as it cost around 20,000Rs for a year. And then it all became worse, when I got to my tenth standard, I used to be early for school as it was my only ride to school. I thought I could improve my vocabulary by studying some newspapers, once again my mocking gang started around me. So I stopped that as well, I also had that inner feeling that I am not going to improve my physique as it become much worse. You know how it feels when all the good looking girls in your class hardly spoke to you and that there was this toppers gang who swept away all the girls with their style. I neither had a grade nor a physique nor a character, so in no way I can even get a girls attention. So I started believing to myself that let it be the reverse way around, if a girl come and speaks to me then I shall show interest in her, otherwise forget any girl who passes in my life. And once again my life was all flooded with my loneliness because of such an attitude. As I saw lot of movies, I was very much fantasied by them, I used to overcome the loneliness problem by believing that there was always someone who was near me, it was like my second voice, I made it my gut feeling, and always followed whatever it said. When my tenth board exams neared I had chickenpox, I got it over but still it made me worse to concentrate in my studies. When I opened my book I always felt, why a guy at such a small age should be given such huge portions, when one is not even going to remember half of it when he goes to the next grade. I hated to remember history; I always felt it was useless to remember the events in the past. The exams went by and I got a score that made me ineligible to study in my own school as well. It was the time when education department made strict policies of lowering the strength in a class and it hit me the worst way possible. It was as if I was dangling around without a school to continue, I was filled with regret.

 I always hated my father for one reason; he used to always quote examples of his colleagues kids who were toppers. Every time my father gave me a piece of advice there would be an example of a successful kid in it, and it made me hate both my father and his advice as well. My parents searched the entire city for admissions and only returned in vein. And by now you can imagine what would have happened to my life; it was scolding and advice again and again and again, until I got an admission in to a school. This time I went from a private school to a government school. It was like I was demoted to a level down. And then the miracle happened, my father finally thought of tuition, well in this case a coaching institute that would improve my carrier. Once again it was a surprise, he suddenly took me to an institute and they said they are conducting the test for admissions in to their institute. I took the test with no hope. Unlike my father, my mother was always a motivator, if it hadn’t been for my mother I wouldn’t have event made it this far. And once again the surprise thing happened; I got admission in to that institute. I still remember what my mother said at that moment, you are lucky to get in to that institute; lot of students try and fail, you still got something left in you, use that well.               

EVERY TIME I MISS AN OPPORTUNITY !

Every time when i miss an opportunity, i feel very much disgraced. When the opportunity is missed my me due to some cause, it comes as a nightmare and haunts me every day until i get a success that drowns the nightmare. But the time in-between the failure and success is a “Hell”, i suggest that the ones who have felt it would describe it much better in their own way.

Every time when i miss my opportunity  and feel as to i could have easily succeeded it. Well, believe me or not it is the much worse part than the one described previously. When i do not get any opportunities for the time period, the nightmare haunts me down. And the consequences are worse, it demotivates me and keeps me off the track. So, i also miss the good ones that ought to be done by me. This is like a chain of events, that keeps on following me until a perfect success. It is like you feel failure after failure after failure in your mind, but it isn't that way. I am pushed in to doing things that aren't worth doing when i hit a failure.

Every time when i miss the opportunity  i feel as if i where the only person God left uncared. Had he reminded me of some way, that i am going to mess it up, i would have surely corrected it and not put the blame on him. It even becomes worse when you can figure it out that, God had made some arrangements for you and you missed it in a miserable way. Well believe me or not this is the worst part of my life. Every things went accordingly except me. So, there is no one to blame other than you and nothing but yourself. This as i already told you is like a series of chained failure thoughts that provoke your mind and brings my overall moral down. Believe me it is easier to bring the moral of ones mind down than to bring it up. If your overall moral goes down, you feel bad in all ways you can and think to hurt yourself for the bad you have done. But, it is not actually you who have to be completely blamed, what about the fate of a person, does it play any role in this picture? The answer is Yes; fate is one that plays on important role in ones life. So, don’t put it all on yourself and say “It is all Fate”, God listens to you.

HUMAN BRAIN – THE TECHNOLOGY !

Human brain is the most complex technology that god has ever created. And till date, no human can harness one similar to that. Our brain is similar to a processor only that it is more than 100 or 1000 times greater than the super computer. Even the super computer has limits, but our brain has no limits. We don’t know as to what is the capacity of our brain.

                One concept of technology that our brain can perform and has been found significantly is that, we all know the searching concept of a computer; our brain also performs a similar search. When we want to know about something or someone or whatever, at once a search is initiated in our brain and the search might go on for minutes, days or even years. But, at one point of time we might get the result. As, we must have read about the concept we are looking for in our brain.

We suddenly might get the answer to our search at any point of time. We might be doing a job totally different from the search result and we may often ignore it, also we might have even forgotten what was the question related to the search (actually we don’t forget anything, it is just that the information is stored deep in our brain, similar to the last address in a hard disk which would be accessed at the end of all). So, this can account for the different thoughts running in our brain. We usually think that, why is this stupid kind of thoughts coming to our brain, but we don’t know that we are the one who initiated them. This may be even related to the concept of dreaming, but also dreaming has other sources as well. There may also be times when the search result comes to our brain in time then we are happy that we found it.

Speaking about the searches, what about a result less search, that is a search initiated in our brain which has no answers at all. This case can be seen in two ways, one we might get the source to it after the search has been started then it is sure to strike the result, but what about the case in which we keep on searching the brain again and again until there is a answer to the question (as there is no case of “no result found”, that is the answer to our search in our brain, maybe we think that when we don’t get the answer to our search in a minute or two then we consider it as “no result found” ). Then there is a process which has no bound and is running in our brain (considered as eating the ram memory).

There may be lot of searches running in our brain that it decreases our concentration power. But the fact that yoga is a tool to increase the concentration power is acceptable. But, does that mean that yoga is the access tool of our brain? May be or might not be as well. May be it is the lite version and that in future we may even find a full version. So the lesson that we have learnt from our l.k.g to our college or whatever  is all in our brain and is not lost and is in some part of our brain.

Same condition applies to memories as well. Then why is that one is an intelligent student and another a weak student (poor in studies)?Does that mean that, the former has a good processor and a good ram compared to the later and also that he has a large HDD capacity. No, everyone is same. God/nature has created every human in the same way. So, there are no differences and all are one and the same. So, anyone can be Einstein and anyone can be Newton. So, don’t think that Einstein or Newton or whomever is the intelligent person in the world, and that you are dumb, in fact you can be more intelligent than them. Researchers say that Einstein is the only person who has used 2% of his brain, then what about us not even a fraction of our brain has been used and is fresh waiting for us to utilize it. 

Who is to be blamed ???

There are a lot of issues that we speak about, nowadays. One such issues is the technology-is it a boon or a bane.

There are a lot of speakers who speak about environment or nature, but its either money or fame that is in their first place and not the nature itself. Now you may wonder, as to why did I deviate from the topic of technology and move to nature. Technology and nature are the best enemies of each other. Technology is much offensive but nature on the other hand is less defensive.   

What is Technology? Technology is an idea that was created by human to make his life much simpler as to what god/nature has proposed. But, don’t you think that we are disobeying nature. We are ! Because we think that nature is static and not dynamic. But, we are wrong, nature is not static. As the Newton’s third and most well renowned law, which is every action has equal and opposite reaction, if we do some mistake then we will have to pay for it one day or the other. So, the nature is waiting to take its revenge on us, just waiting for the perfect moment.  Natural disasters are one way how nature shows its revenge on us. So, if we suffer from a natural phenomenon then the gods/nature is not the one to be blamed.

Why did we need technology for? We needed technology for the betterment of the human race. I would describe technology as a curse, because it attracts everyone and everything. If we chose something very beautiful, then it has something very dangerous waiting for us. I’m not telling you that marrying a beautiful girl has consequences, which we do know (no offence against girls) , in fact everymen wants a beautiful woman to support his life. But, marrying a technology has its consequences, by marriage here I meant to those who love to have the latest tech in their hands. In fact now days, technology is knowledge. But, is it so. We created technology to support knowledge, but now we say technology is knowledge. If we attend an interview, the interviewer asks the interviewee about his/her knowledge in technology and if one is good in that he is more considered than the others. Nowadays, starting from a five year old kid to a fifty year old man everyone play with technology. Technology was knowledge, is entertainment, and will be life.

How did technology get its picture in the first place? We can relate the start of technology back to the days of war, when the scientists where working hard enough to find stuffs that could beat the opponent in large numbers. They started finding nuclear bombs that could wipe an entire city in to ashes. But at one point of time humans have found enough bombs that could wipe the entire earth.

So, he stopped concentrating on technology as war and started technology as luxury, which even turned out to be much fatal as the former had an ending but the later has no ending. We nowadays find phones and laptops and gadgets, not even knowing the consequences of not disposing it properly. The nature is a life cycle in which humans have to play their role as humans, but we invented technology and gave it a place in the life cycle thinking that the nature would accept it. But, our assumption was wrong the nature rejected it (non-decompose products).

                Who is to be blamed the producer or the consumer of technology? If we as the consumers stop consuming the technology then the producers would have no choice but to quit. But, as we all know human mind is not an ideal one, we would be an environmentalist but would be using the latest tech. And what about the case of producers, why can’t the producers stop the production of technology and start a green revolution,  this intern is not possible as the producers are no other than the greedy money hunters, who want both money and reputation in their life. So, is it that we have no choice???